Dear humans,

I have been informed that today marks the half-way point before taking out my staples. And yet, there is only one day left of sedatives. Mother is weeping.

Coincidentally, mother also received a call from Staples about a free business perks program. The walls have eyes. Fear everything.

Also, the browser has crashed twice while typing this. I fear there may be a staples conspiracy. I hope it involves post-it notes, and not waking up from another surgery. Either way, I'm trying to be good, while also being very VERY suspicious of everything today.

The vet called this morning to check on me, and She Who Is No Fun asked if there could be more fun, so I'll give her that. The answer, however, was no. I must behave for another full week (or seven weeks, in dog years).

The vet said that my results have still not come back from the lab (hey, it was the Lab that gave 'em to ya, ba-dum-bum), but they'll nag them a bit tomorrow, so we can have some answers – and a reason for my misery.   

After yesterday's warm weather, the snow in the back yard had frozen over in places, so mom was SUPER-whiny about the places she would and wouldn't go with me. I got even by taking her through the raspberry canes, where one of my bunny friends had left me presents. She gave in, because eating them was my only joy today, but there shall be no kisses. So at least she won't complain I'm trying to slice her throat with my halo (which she's calling a shiv more often now).   

The Stinky Brother got to go for a walk in the woods with a bunch of our friends today, while I stayed home. Mom said at least one dog will be less of a pain in the ass today. I hate her, she's not my real mother.   

Gráinne, and even Cadeau, are coming downstairs a lot more. I try to give them kisses, but then they scream "the shiv! the shiv!", and run away from me. And then mom yells at me for trying to run.   

She did let me go upstairs to the studio today, as long as I walked slowly. And I got to go on the balcony too, where there was lots of snow to eat. But after all that excitement, I didn't really want to stay up there, and have been spending most of my time in the dog bed in the sunroom that Jasper and I usually ignore. Mom is happy it's getting some use.   

Today was a super-stressful day for her, because of some people shit, she says (tell me about it!), so she had one of her big gushy nosebleeds, and I stole a bloody kleenex. Almost as good as bunny poop. She told me I'd make a good vampire, if she painted my halo black. I think that's rude. But the bloody kleenex was delicious. I hope tomorrow is a bad day too!   

Apparently we're having creamy pasta and wine tonight, and then snuggling in front of the fire, because people suck. Well, I'm having kibble and watching her have creamy pasta and wine. But I do like the snuggle part!   

Since one of the people-y things was someone accusing her of stuff she didn't do, she told me I had to be nice and share a GIF of a donkey playing with a ball, so that I stop adding to the shit-pile. I still don't think this is what she was talking about, but here ya go: https://tenor.com/en-CA/view/donkey-playing-with-ball-having-fun-playful-ball-gif-14583968   

Love, and bunny-present-free-schlurps     
Macie